November

People around me keep complaining about the weather. Dark, gloomy, rainy, cold, dark. Yes, dark twice since that is what gets people the most it seems.
Apparently November has the worst weather of the year. Apparently the fact that it's dark when you wake up and dark when you go home from work causes you to become this whining creature who can't stop obsessing about the weather.

I don't mind November.

Sure constant rain is a bit impractical and there might be things you put off doing because of it, but I don't mind November weather. It gives me a perfect excuse to stay inside and cuddle up on the sofa with a cup of tea and watch tv.
I can't even say that I feel more tired now when it gets dark sooner. A big plus about it getting dark is that I get to admire my reflection in any window without having to go find a mirror! Hee! And I do like my reflection. Just a little while go I answered an online survey about my body image as a woman. One of the questions was about the likelihood of me getting cosmetic surgery if I didn't have to worry about the financial bits. I answered Not likely. The problems I have with my body have nothing to do with how it looks. Aches and pains and things like that have more to do with actual function than perception.

Another thing about November is that it seems that it goes by really quickly. At least to me this year. First half already behind us and the rest is just a short pit stop before the holiday season kicks in.

Speaking of holiday season; I will have to start figuring out what to get the families for Christmas. Only 36 days to go.

keah

Blue Christmas

This second Sunday of Advent is a day of reflection. Soon about to wrap up the second year of living in Stockholm. Life is slightly more organised this time around compared to last year. However, last year I had lots more energy and drive than I have now. I was happy about my job, pleased that my life was getting back on track, had ideas and the motivation to make them happen. Now Christmas is around the corner and it feels like the expectations (my own mostly) of the festive season is falling over me and I have no energy to make anything of it. On the other hand the sane and realistic part of me tells me that life still goes on even if I take a time-out from the hysteria of the season.

It's like I can't see the things we have actually accomplished this past year and be happy about it. I keep focusing on the long to-do list of things we have yet to do, plan, take care of, manage, in order to get the perfect life. How pathetic. I should have learned by now that there is no such thing as a perfect life, but I keep living for "when we've accomplished ... things will get better".

And the sane part of me has a very small voice at the moment so I feel stressed and like a failure for not being able to successfully administer my way through the to-do list.

When I've reorganised the kitchen cupboards, bought new beds, built a wardrobe, bought home office furniture, baked ginger thins, gotten birds, done the laundry, put up the new bathroom cabinet and lamp, started exercising, found a new and interesting job...

... then I'll be happy

keah